May 20, 2005

Filthy Lie

No more excuses about my failure to complete Alliance assignments. Do, or do not; there is not try. Anyway, apparently the Puppy Sipping Master of the Internet isn't taking too kindly to Arianna Huffington sticking her beak into his domain, which leads us to this week's assignment: What will Evil Glenn do about Arianna Huffington and the Huffington Post?

Top Ten Things Evil Glenn Will Do To Punish Ariannia and her Website

10) After noticing that his midsection has gotten flabby, Evil Glenn will unleash one month's worth of potential canine protein shakes on Arianna's central office where they will wreak the sort of havoc that only 3000 puppies can.

9) Mention her dismissively her on his blog: But, I confess, I find the question of what Arianna thinks less pressing than I used to.

8) Hack penguin porn onto her website. Then again, that might drive up the Huffington Bloat's traffic, so that's probably a non-starter.

7) Mention off-handedly that Arianna opposes gay marriage. Andrew Sullivan will immediately denounce any subsequent statement by her as "gob-smackingly vile".

6) Photoshop pictures of Arianna wearing T-shirts emblazoned with the slogan "California Condor: the other white meat."

5) Pay Howard Dean to act as publicist for her website.

4) Hire Ted Kennedy to be her chauffeur.

3) Google Bomb the phrase "Huffington Post" so that this is the website that people will find.

2) Use the forces of Darkness to raise an army of undead hobo minions to eradicate her and her website.

And the number one thing that Evil Glenn is likely to do about Arianna and the Huffington Post:

1) Ignore them because they're just not worth the effort.

Posted by Physics Geek at May 20, 2005 09:09 PM StumbleUpon Toolbar Stumble It!

LOL #6 :-D

Posted by: Harvey at May 21, 2005 03:11 PM

HA! classic.

Posted by: Patriot Xeno at May 22, 2005 10:55 PM