April 29, 2004

This week's sign that the Apocalypse is upon us

I hear that the Spice Girls have a greatest hits album out. Truthfully, it could have been out for 10 years and I wouldn't have noticed. It could be worse though: they could have a reunion tour. ::shudder:: Mel C has been pretty adamant that she will NOT perform with the other Spice Girls, regardless of how much money she is offered. Looks like it's a good time to break out the Spice Girls Application again:
=================================
The Spice Girls Application Form
-------------------------------------
Name:

Age:

Real Age:

How would you best describe yourself?

( ) An energetic self-starter

( ) A team player

( ) A tasty, albeit untalented, bit of crumpet

Do you have any detectable vestige of talent, besides your tits?

Would it bother you to be the target of unrelenting hatred?

"I am willing to trade sexual favours for a career in the music
industry."

( )Yes ( )No

How many times have you been kicked out of a karaoke bar?

Does nudity bother you? If so, give three excuses for your
portfolio.

Explain the difficulties in identifying the source of individual
free will in light of the deterministic theories of neurochemical
medicine and modern behavioralist psychology. Just kidding!!
Seriously, do you like leather mini-skirts?

( )Yes ( )No

Are you deceptively attractive in coloured or stroboscopic light?

( )Yes ( )No

Choose an appropriate nickname:

Sexy, Nasty, Sweetie, Syphilis, Lardy, Sickly, Sporty, Slappy.

Choose an appropriate image:

( ) Cute, blonde, appeals to pedophiles

( ) Tub of lard

( ) Bloke. In a tracksuit.

( ) Vacant stare, no discernible brain activity

( ) Terrifying to small children and old men

( ) All of the above

Do you promise to make one album and then go away forever?

( )Yes ( )No

If two trains leave Liverpool an hour apart at 90 kilometers, and
75 kilometers an hour, respectively, how would you look in a
bikini?

If required as part of your contract, would you be willing to
help alleviate Prince Charles's loneliness?

( )Yes ( )No

In space provided, tell us why you want, why you really, really,
want this job.

Posted by Physics Geek at April 29, 2004 02:04 PM StumbleUpon Toolbar Stumble It!
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